


Here Next to Me (Where You Belong)

by humanitys_cutest



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, tw: changmin cries and stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-05
Updated: 2015-07-05
Packaged: 2018-04-07 21:20:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4278318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/humanitys_cutest/pseuds/humanitys_cutest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Changmin calls Yunho backstage after the concert.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Here Next to Me (Where You Belong)

**Author's Note:**

> I was feeling a lot of things this morning (mostly shitty things) so I decided everyone should feel (mostly shitty) things too. I'm a little sorry. 
> 
> Also, ALWAYS SUPPORT CHANGMIN!! AND YUNHO!! AND TVXQ!!

When Changmin finally gets backstage, his hands are shaking and he's breathing hard. There's no reason for it; he did well, he knows he did, the fans accepted him and cheered him on and he _did well_.

And yet. His heart feels heavy and it's like a limb is missing, no matter how hard he tries to assure himself that everything is okay.

He goes to his dressing room, and the staff seem to know he's not all okay, because they leave him alone. He's grateful for it.

Shutting the door behind him, he lays down on the couch and stares at his phone. Should he call? He doesn't want to take away Yunho's time and attention from his family, but he wants to hear Yunho's voice. He'll never admit it out loud, but standing on stage alone without him nearby or even in the same building had shaken him in a way that he didn't know how to explain. All he knew was that he hated the feeling.

His inner debate is cut short when the phone rings in his hand, and he jumps a little. Yunho's name flashes on his screen, along with a picture of him with makeup on from their encore concert. He's making a ridiculous kissy face, and it never fails to make Changmin laugh. Recovering hastily, he scrambles to answer the call, heart swelling.

"Hey hyung," he says breathlessly.

"Hey yourself," comes the warm reply, and all of a sudden Changmin feels a lump in his throat and wetness in his eyes, and a ridiculous urge to cry washes over him.

He swallows hard.

There's a small silence, and then Yunho asks, "How was the concert?"

"Fine." A pause, and then, voice small, he admits, "Would've been better if you were there." He doesn't know where the words come from, but it doesn't even occur to him to hold back. He's too tired to think worry about what he's saying.

Yunho chuckles warmly. "I really doubt it. Heard you got a red ocean all of your own." He's teasing Changmin, he knows it, but Changmin doesn't like it.

"I don't want my own red ocean," he says, and he can hear the pout in his voice alongside the wobble.

Yunho laughs again. When he quiets down there's a longer pause than before, and then he says, voice achingly tender, "I'm proud of you, baby boy."

And that's it, the dam breaks and those terrible feelings rush to the surface and Changmin bursts into tears. At first it's a quiet whimper, but then a sob escapes and another, and soon he's bawling into the phone like a child.

Yunho is making shushing noises in his ear, saying his name in seven different ways over and over again. It just reminds him that Yunho's not here next to him where he belongs, and it makes him cry even harder.

Yunho chuckles again in his ear, sounding the tiniest bit amused. "Shut up, you jerk," Changmin mumbles when he's calmed down some. He rubs at his eyes, mouth turned down unhappily.

"Why are you crying, you did so well on your own Changminnie," Yunho says. Changmin presses the phone closer to his ear.

"I don't want to be on my own," he whispers, voice catching.

"I know, baby, I know. It was going to happen someday."

Changmin says nothing, because he knows Yunho is right. There's nothing to be done for it. "I miss you," he says instead, eyes tearing up again. He shuts them tightly, willing the waver in his voice away.

"I miss you too," Yunho replies, and his voice is just a little sad but comforting all the same. "I hear you wouldn't wear your own stage outfits," he says then, changing the subject, and Changmin lets him. There's an odd note in Yunho's voice.

"Mmm," he hums noncommittally. The drying tears on his face have become itchy and he rubs at them irritably.

"They don't even fit you," Yunho chuckles.

"No, they don't," Changmin agrees, smiling a little through his tears.

"Fans figured you out, you know."

"I expect no less from them."

A pause, and then Yunho says, his voice low and dark, "You look sexy."

Changmin smiles a little wider and lets out a wet laugh. Yunho's words are inappropriate for the way Changmin knows he's feeling, but he also knows Yunho's just trying to get them both to think about something else other than the unhappiness of being separated. "How would you know, you haven't even seen me yet."

"Fans posted pictures," Yunho hums.

"Uh huh," Changmin says knowingly.

"...Siwon may have sent me some."

Changmin laughs, feeling a little better. "Of course he did."

There's another silence, but this one is comfortable and familiar, both lost in their own thoughts.

"I really am proud of you, Changdola," Yunho speaks up.

"I know."

"Good," Yunho says simply.

And then they're back to the tense silence.

"I'm gonna miss you," Yunho says, breaking the silence, and the words are enough to have the tears spring up again.

He can't reply, just makes a pained sound. He hears Yunho sigh on the other end.

"Hyung," Changmin says wetly. "You can't go."

"Changminnie-"

And the sobs come back full force. "You can't leave, you can't leave me, hyung."

"Changdola, please, don't-"

"Who am I supposed to yell at for messing up our apartment if you're not there?" Changmin sobs.

"Baby..."

"Who's supposed to sleep with me at night and hold me when I have nightmares?" Fuck, the tears won't stop, he can't stop crying.

"Shhh, Changmin please, it'll be okay, I promise," Yunho hushes him, and his voice has always comforted Changmin but now he can't stop.

"No it won't, two years is too long, what if one of us..." Changmin stops, breath catching as terror seizes him.

There's a painful silence, the only sound between them Changmin's painfully heavy breathing.

"Changmin," Yunho says firmly. "Nothing is going to happen, to either of us."

"How do you-"

Yunho cuts him off. "I know, okay? You're going to be okay and I'm going to be okay and we're going to come back in two years and Tokyo dome will scream welcome back, okay?"

Changmin draws in a shuddering breath.

"Changmin. Okay?"

Changmin nods, feels like an idiot when he realizes Yunho can't see him, and then says, shakily, "Okay."

"Okay. Take a deep breath for me, baby," he instructs.

Changmin does, breathing in and out as Yunho talks him through it.

"You okay now?" His voice has gone back to soft and soothing, just what Changmin needs.

"I really hate this," Changmin mumbles, closing his eyes.

"I know, Changminnie. I don't like it either."

Changmin closes his eyes. "I'm sorry, I don't know why-"

"Don't," Yunho interrupts. "Don't apologize, there's nothing to be sorry for."

Another silence, as Changmin's breathing slows down and he feels marginally okay.

"There is good news, though."

"What?" Changmin says warily.

"You'll get conjugal visits," Yunho says cheerfully.

Changmin bursts out laughing.

"There's the laugh I love so much," Yunho says, a smile in his voice. Changmin finds himself smiling too.

It's not ideal. Yunho will be gone in a few days, and soon Changmin will follow him into the army. They won't see each other for almost two years, won't be able to touch and hug and kiss as they do. There won't be anyone to make stupid faces with, no one to send his selfies to, no one to snuggle with as they watched movies. He won't be there to make sure Yunho eats food regularly, that he doesn't strain himself or push himself too hard.

But they'll make it work.

"I love you, Yunho."

And the soft reply, "I love you too."

Changmin would wait forever for Yunho.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are love ^^


End file.
